Missionary Kids (MK) are Third Cultural Kids (TCK)
Help! We can't fit in your tummy and culture!
Nathaniel (age 20) & Hannah (age 18)
Birthday: Nathaniel 13 Jan 90;
Hannah 22 Dec 91
Grade: Year 2 (Mechanical Engineering) at University of New South Wales, Sydney, Australia
Gap year: Will return to Sydney, Australia for university from March 2011
News from Hannah Lai (18), serving in an orpahange in Kenya
5 Aug 2010:
“yesterday, kenya is voting wether to have a new consititution or remain with the old one. so...today i think they wil announce the results. last week at the orphanage we made chapatis [Indian pancake] ! we made it from 3 in the morning all the way until 11 at night, way past the kids bedtimes. it was super fun though, we rolled and rolled and fried and fried until our backs were sore, but we had fun the whole time. its rare for them to eat chapatis, its expensive addign teh flour and oil and sugar and salt and charcoal altogehter. we also had CHICKEN, and it had been 3 years since they had cooked chicken in that place! imagine! potatoes, tomatoes, onions, and cabbage were also in the menu which was so good for the kids compared to the regular plain ugali or githeri!
also, i was invited to a "prize giving day" at one of the local schools, it was kinda like a mid-year graduation. even though the school year had not finished the still gave out awards to the kids who had earned the highest marks. there were 15 kids from the orphanage which attended this secondary school, and i was invited by them to represent as their guardian!|!!! imagine! 2 of them received an award, one of them was headboy, like school president, and i felt so honored that i was able to go up there, shake their hand and get a picture with them! i sat in the tent for the "parents" and i felt special! :) it was kinda sad though, seeing some kids recognized for the brilliance, but their parents were not there to share the moment with them, yet they had received top marks!!!!
im staying with dorcas and her family. yesterday i helped the medical team called bread of life church. they were in the slum wher pastor melody has her school, i think it is called makuru. many of the kids from her school also were there and i played with them mostly, i didnt do any medical type of thing. though i got a massage on my back from one of the members and it was so painful!! hehe.
i received your sms. thanks!|!! hannah!”
Another News from Hannah Lai (18), serving in an orpahange in Kenya
Jul 2010:
“…sometimes when i walk around during the day, i see no teachers in the classroom and i will stop by and be a teacher for that subject, so far, i have taught geometry, christian studies and bible stories, some science, english class, i also go with them to their P.E. class. i have gotten to know quite a few names, most of the boarders and teachers, i have so much respect for them. such an eager desire to learn and a heart after God. they are teaching me so much.
each day they have porridge for breakfast, if there is chai for the kids, it is rare, usually tea is only for staff and teachers. lunch and dinner is either githeri or ugual&beans, no rice, no sukama wiki, no fruit, their diet is so limited. but for 2 days i fasted with the older kids, they fast every second week which is incredible even though they have such limited food! such a testimony to me that they would rather pray than to eat.
everyday the kids wake up around 430, some clean the hostel, while the form school students start walking to school (the bethlehem school only goes to standard 8) at 630, breakfast time, by 7 they are ready for school and in their uniforms. 8-there is assembly. 830- they start school. there are a few breaks and lunch in between. all the kids love learning, it is so fun teaching them they are so interested in everything!
on saturday, gilani butchery at ABC place donates 10k of meat to the orphanage, so this past saturday, i went with them to get the meat, we took a bus, walked thru a market in downtown nairobi than took another matatu to get to westland. fun fun fun at night after dinner, beacuse there is no electricity at this place, they use gas lamps and the kids have to crowd around one tiny gas lamp for light! we sleep early, maybe around 930 and wake up early. now i am naturally waking up at 630! though at night, they turn on the generator to watch the world cup games, and also in the morning the generator is used for pumping water...”
hannah!
Be Flexible-- by Nathaniel Lai (19)
Saturday, February 14, 2009 at 9:29am
One thing I learned most during my time on the Doulos was to “be flexible”. It was probably during my first I-Night in Dili, Timor Leste that I first learned this lesson.
There was a sign up sheet for the bus to come at 3:30, which meant that we would be skipping dinner. We had to wrap our own sandwiches at lunch, and bring along whatever fruit we could find. 4:30 came around. Then 5:30. We finally decided to go to dinner. Soon it was 6:00. Then we heard the news that the bus had been canceled.
It was very disappointing, but around 20 of us decided to get ourselves into taxis. Arranging the logistics for this group of 20 would have been anyone’s nightmare. First we had to track down someone who actually knew the address of where our lovely little function was held. Then we had to divide ourselves into co-ed groups of 4, preferably with one person knowing how to speak some of the local languages. The Timorese people speak “Tetum”, along with a little bit of Bahasa and some Portugese, which made it difficult for us. Finally we had to flag down some taxis and communicate with them where we needed to go. Sometimes we would get taxis with people already riding inside. Somehow, by the grace of God, we all ended up at the destination.
By the time we had gotten there, the show was half over. But what I saw was probably worth it. There was a Japanese girl who sang Psalm 23 beautifully in japanese, with the translation in Tetum on a projector screen. Even though there are few Japanese people who are Christians, this one girl sang about her faith despite all odds. After that, there was a drama. More precisely, it was the “everything” drama, which depicts the fall of man, and God restoring him through salvation. It was a simple drama, but extremely powerful. I could see how the people were clearly moved by how they cheered and clapped. Although the ordeal in getting to the I-Night was troublesome, I can definitely say that it was well worth it.
Why Doulos became Home for me? by Nathaniel Lai (19)
Saturday, January 24, 2009 at 8:52pm
Here are a few reasons I really appreciated ship's life and some things I miss from the Doulos:
1. There was an American and a Canadian both in a room, and they appreciated each others company. They didn't call each other names, or insult each others country. 2. There was an Aussie and a Kiwi in a room, and they insulted each other and told jokes about each other's country. (I want to know how anzac day is like on the ship) 3. Next to the vegemite, you can find the korean chili. 4. If I say I'm Australian, people don't give me blank looks. 5. People on the ship always said hi or hey when you passed them on main Street. 6. The cheers! 7. On any given day, you could be sitting with a Mongolian, an Indian, and a Japanese person. They might not know you. They might not understand your English. But they rejoice in the fact that we are brought together by God. 8. Weird English phrases such as "OH MY LIFE!" and "Thank you so much." 9. You are surrounded by people! There are people everywhere! I can't even live now! (Okay not true but still). 10. Seperating the rubbish! 11. "Hey Nadaniel!" "Hey nat!" "hey Nataniel" "Hey Nahaniel" etc...
Yeah....
Baptism Testimony: "My name is Nathaniel Lai, and I am 14 in 8th Grade. I was saved when I was 6 in a holiday camp my parents sent me into. I heard about baptism one Sunday and the Holy Spirit urged me to get baptised. I don't hink it would have happened any other way, because I'd be scared or put up excuses if it wasn't for the Holy Spirit. Today, I want to admit to everyone here that I am a Christian and I am born-again."
Nathaniel Lai at Rift Valleny Academy, Kenya on 27 June 2004, Sunday.
Nathaniel Nelson Lai’s bio
(Please scroll down to the bottom for Chinese translation)
Hello, my name is Nathaniel Lai, and I was born on 13 Jan 1990. My parents both migrated from Hong Kong to Australia, and I was born in HornsbyHospital, Sydney. I am an Australian Born Chinese, but also an MK (Missionary Kid). I lived in Sydney until I was around 7. My parents then became missionaries in East Africa, during the time I was going into year 3. By the time I was 8, I had a clear understanding of what it meant to be a Christian. From then on, I spent most of my time in East Africa. Most of my life was not much different, to be honest, I went to school like normal, and I learned things. It was not until I was sent into boarding school located near the rural town of Kijabe, in the Rift Valley. It is (surprisingly) called Rift Valley Academy (RVA). By the time I was 10 years old, I was transferred into a boarding school, and I actually learnt more of the country that I was in. Many things have happened since then. Before then, I didn’t have any close African friends, or know much about the culture there. My mother especially didn’t let any African kids into the house, because she was afraid they would steal things. It was actually in the school, RVA, that I learned more about Africa from what my friends told me. I lived in a dormitory that had many of my classmates in it. They would make us do chores, and although I was clumsy and slow at first, I gradually got along with the system. Stuff like sweeping and mopping, which I had no prior experience to, became automatic tasks. At the end of each term, they have “dorm cleanup”, where we have to clean the entire dorm, every nook and cranny, one of the many traditions of RVA. RVA has just recently reached its centennial mark, just recently having its 100th anniversary.
RVA is very multicultural. In my class alone, I have Kenyans, Koreans, Dutch, Germans, Brits, Americans, Canadians, Tanzanians, Australians, and Chinese. In fact, we have a multicultural day, which always is a big commotion. I have really learned to appreciate aspects of other people’s culture, so sometimes I get angry at other people when they make fun of other cultures when they have absolutely no idea what they are talking about.
Most of my class comes from mission organizations, or other such organizations. One of my friend’s father works for World Vision, and another’s father used to be a Member of the Parliament in Kenya.
i'm the biggest soccer fan and the worst cook you'll ever find. i eat dessert first, start cd's from the middle,spontaneously LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST...and i've never gone skiing. so i think you should take me! YUP YUP oh yea. i live in africa and loving it.
Why I Enjoy Being a MK
by Hannah Lai, 2007
Where are you from?
The question I’ve had to answer so many times but I still wasn’t quite sure how to answer. Where should I start? Should I say: I’m from Australia? But they’ll get confused. They’ll ask ‘Aren’t you from China?’ Maybe I’ll say I’m from Hong Kong? No, not really, that’s where my parents are from. Kenya? They’ll just ask ‘where’s that?’
Eventually I sum up my life story into a simple sentence: Well, my parents are from Hong Kong, but after they got married they moved to Australia where they had me & my brother, than we went into Kenya for missionary work and I have lived there for more than half of my life now.
When my dad asked me and my brother to write an article about why I like being a MK, I thought not again. Not that I’ve had to write many articles, but I’ve had to answer such questions before.
I don’t know where to start. Should I start by naming my favorite airport, or suggesting what the most fun thing to do while transiting at an airport; maybe how many countries I’ve visited? I’m not sure.
I like being an MK because…
I can travel. I love traveling.
I can have friends from all over the world.
It’s easier for me to adapt to change.
I get to go to boarding school and have heaps of fun. J
I’m a third culture kid. (Actually I don’t know if that’s good or bad)
I get to see & experience different cultures
I’m closer to God; He helps me when I’m missing my friends too much.
I get to tell stories about Africa.
I watch most of my movies in the airplane than in the cinema.
Verbal Poem
-By Hannah Monica Lai (age 13 in 2005)
I’m thankful for the changing invention of chocolates;
With tempting assortments,
Overwhelming flavors
And lavishing sugars,
All an irresistible refreshing delight,
I love meeting people like me;
Keeping in touch with my scattered friends,
Hearing their experiences from around the world,
Reading their stories that seem to have no end
Knowing they know how a MK really feels.
I want to explore this world that I live in;
To travel to every country,
To climb Mt.Kilimanjaro in my Junior Year,
To accomplish Chinese,
To see the God in which I fear.
Nov 9, 2005 Dallas, Texas, USA
Hannah Monica Lai’s bio
Hi!! My name is Hannah Lai and I was born on 22 December 1991.…Being an MK (Missionary Kid) is very enjoyable for me because I like experiencing many different cultures, traveling and meeting different people. When people ask me, “where are you from?” I don’t know how to respond. I know my passport number but I don’t even remember my mum’s mobile when she travels in different countries. There are many things missionary kids feel differently but I don’t mind…most of the time.
I left Australia when I was 6 years old. I go to the same boarding school, Rift Valley Academy (RVA), as my brother in Kenya. I have been there since year 4. Starting in year 7 my parents lived in Uganda and me and my brother stayed in Uganda, from then on, at holidays we had to fly to Uganda (or my parents would drive 12 hours to Kenya and then 12 hours back.
One day in 3rd grade, I was home alone and looking through many gospel videos and found the JESUS FILM produced by Campus Crusade for Christ!! So I put it in to watch … I felt touched and when it came to the part where Jesus was dying on the cross I started crying. I felt really bad for what I had done in my life. I felt as if the sins I did were pounding that nail into Jesus hand deeper and deeper. There is a church song which has the line, “it was my sin which held him there.” I really wanted to say sorry… so at the end of the film I kneeled down and accepted Jesus as my personal saviour. From that moment on I didn’t question if I had Jesus in my heart or not because I knew for certain Jesus was my saviour.
I enjoy being at my boarding school because its fun, I have good friends and I get to learn. I have been there since I was in year 4 so I really like it there and I am used to being away from my parents. I also want to graduate there because I was there since really young, and I would like to graduate with my friends. Another reason I like my boarding school is because I get to live in a dorm with my classmates and other friends and we have a really fun time. I also enjoy all the sports the school makes available to us and its very fun going into Nairobi for games. The RVA band is also a pretty good band, for Kenya standards and it fun sometimes. We get to go into Nairobi and perform for different people.
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When our children are ready for college, what do good parents do?
Some thoughts on this matter, by Laura Mae Gardner
June, 2006
“Can you give me a clear and definitive Biblical principle that will tell my husband and me what we should do about our nearly adult children? Should we send them home to continue their education or should we go home with them?” Isn’t it a matter of our commitment to God and to the task that we send them home and get on with the work? Or do we have some other responsibility in this matter?”
Is there a clear Biblical principle, or command, or example?
Well, there’s Abraham who was willing to sacrifice the son of promise, Isaac, the son of his old age (Genesis 22). (See Phil Skellie’s article, “Living Sacrifices” in EMQ, July 2006, pages 380-384).
And then there is Matt 10:37, 38 speaking of a greater love for God than for family member. And Matt 19:29 promises that those who do leave family members (including children) will receive ‘a hundred fold’. (See also Luke 18:28, 29).
What about I Timothy 5:8?“If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (NLB).
It is clear that there is no single right answer to the dilemma. But I believe there are some principles to guide us in making a decision that is right for a given child, or a particular family. Do we go home with our young adult children, or do we send them alone to cope with this next stage of young adulthood?
Relationship to that child. Is this child communicative with you, trusts you, and shares freely his/her hopes and fears, deepest desires, and tells you his/her preferences in this matter, and the reasons behind those preferences?
Relationship of this child with God. Is this young person dependent on God’s guidance, and tries wholeheartedly to follow where God is leading? Does your young adult have a habit of looking to God to meet his/her needs?
Support circle in the home country. Does young son or daughter have a place to call home during school vacations, or for special holidays? Is the church he or she will attend familiar with the special characteristics of missionary kids, and is he or she likely to find a wholesome youth group there?
Your commitment to the child. Does he or she know that if he needs you, you’ll come, no matter what the cost, and no matter what stage your ministry is at? Do your children know their relative importance in your life that they come ahead of the task?
Do you have a sense of God’s peace in making this decision? You will want to remember that either decision comes with a cost, peace does not preclude pain.
Availability. Remember that connections with your young adult child are much easier today, with email, skype, cell phones, etc. This might remind us to honor those missionary parents of former days who were dependent on snail mail for communications with their children so far away.
Member care workers can support parents in this decision, first by refusing to make the decision for them, and secondly, by supporting them in whatever decision they make. We can help them by walking them through the factors involved in this decision. And when they have made that decision, we can support them as they live with the consequences. The two feelings they are most likely to experience are guilt—how could we have done that? And grief—the great sadness of seeing a child leave home, and knowing things will never be the same again—that’s a great grief. They might also experience criticism no matter what decision they have made. Some will feel they should have put the work first, if they decide to go home with the child for this season in that child’s life. Others will criticize them if they send the child home alone to cope with all the newness and temptations. A member care worker can remind these folks that it is to God that we live, and not by others’ opinions.
宣教士子女見證————賴以信、賴以行
（父母：賴顯光牧師和黃婉群師母）
◎賴以信
你好，我叫賴以信 (Nathaniel Lai)，今年16嵗。我的父母早年從香港移居澳洲，我在悉尼的Hornsby(康士比)醫院出生，是澳洲籍華人。我也是MK「宣教士子女」。七歲那年，父母成為東非的宣教士，我便跟隨他們到那兒上學。那時我上三年級。八歲時我已很清楚我是一名基督徒。由那時開始，我的童年都在東非渡過。我的生活與其他孩子比較沒有甚麼不一樣；實際上，我也和其他孩子一樣上學，直至十歲那年，我和妹妹轉到肯雅客集比鎮(Kijabe)的大裂谷學院 (Rift Valley Academy -- RVA)寄宿學校讀書，我才對非洲有更深入的認識。我從身邊的朋友認識更多關於非洲的事。我和同學們一起住在宿舍，他們教我做雜務。起初較為笨手笨腳，後來慢慢習慣了，對掃地擦地等工作駕輕就熟。每個學期結束前，我們都要按學校傳統規定，將宿舍每一角落都打掃得乾乾淨淨。學院最近剛渡過100歲生日了！
Nathaniel (age 20) & Hannah (age 18) 
